Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
