this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
