My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Randomize
