bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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