So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
They have beer where we have blood.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
