btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He called his prostate his "boner button".
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
