What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
