no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize