How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
