if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize