i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize