This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
