hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
