You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
