I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
