no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
