Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
