sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
