I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
