In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize