So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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