Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
