I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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