Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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