...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize