I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
