I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
this just has baby written all over it
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
