i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
how drunk are you?
Several
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
