My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
