Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
