YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
