you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
