Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
