So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
