Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize