Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
