He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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