The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Are we still banned from the library?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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