if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize