Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
