She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We need to get me chipped asap
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize