We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize