I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
