You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
