Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
