whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
