All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
