I'm lost and stupid without you.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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