get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
