is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
