just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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